Newbie

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Re: Newbie

Postby Brock » Sat Sep 08, 2018 3:19 pm

Kitty, Theo is giving you good advise, I will add this link to an AA leaflet call -’This is AA.’
https://www.aa.org/assets/en_US/p-1_thisisaa1.pdf
Around page 13 they speak of the 24 hour plan, I will copy it here -

The 24-hour plan

For example, we take no pledges, we don’t say that we will “never” drink again. Instead, we try to follow what we in A.A. call the “24-hour plan.” We concentrate on keeping sober just the current twenty-four hours. We simply try to get through one day at a time without a drink. If we feel the urge for a drink, we neither yield nor resist. We merely put off taking that particular drink until tomorrow. We try to keep our thinking honest and realistic where alcohol is concerned. If we are tempted to drink — and the temptation usually fades after the first few months in A.A. — we ask ourselves whether the particular drink we have in mind would be worth all the consequences we have experienced from drinking in the past. We bear in mind that we are perfectly free to get drunk, if we want to, that the choice between drinking and not drinking is entirely up to us. Most important of all, we try to face up to the fact that, no matter 13 how long we may have been dry, we will always be alcoholics — and alcoholics, as far as we know, can never again drink socially or normally. We follow the experience of the successful “oldtimers” in another respect. We usually keep coming regularly to meetings of the local A.A. group with which we have become affiliated. There is no rule which makes such attendance compulsory. Nor can we always explain why we seem to get a lift out of hearing the personal stories and interpretations of other members. Most of us, however, feel that attendance at meetings and other informal contacts with fellow A.A.s are important factors in the maintenance of our sobriety.

Twelve Steps

Early in our association with A.A. we heard about the “Twelve Steps” of recovery from...

It’s important to note that this is immediately followed by the section on the 12 steps, you will hear folks in AA often saying this ‘one day at a time’ slogan, it is meant to mean we live one day at a time, but some poor people believe it’s about staying sober one day at a time for life. It’s only meant to be until you get through the steps that you struggle a bit, and think just one day at a time I can make it, the steps make promises like this - “We are not fighting it, neither are we avoiding temptation. We feel as though we had been placed in a position of neutrality safe and protected. We have not even sworn off. Instead, the problem has been removed. It does not exist for us.” If the problem does not exist, we no longer have to try one day at a time do we! Like I said before, it takes a little guts at first, that’s where the one day deal is useful.
"Good morning, this is your Higher Power speaking. I will not be needing your help today."
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Re: Newbie

Postby avaneesh912 » Sat Sep 08, 2018 3:31 pm

It helps to have a deep realization that we are alcoholic. That gift comes from within. Once we have that realization, rest of the steps is something we have to perform in order for us to experience the state of neutrality the book talks about. There will be that un-wavering/unshakable decision made for us.
Show him, from your own experience, how the peculiar mental condition surrounding that first drink prevents normal functioning of the will power (Alcoholics Anonymous, Page 92)
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Re: Newbie

Postby Kitty1259 » Sat Sep 08, 2018 3:53 pm

Theo....if not noticed, I edited my post.

Sigh.

Everybody have a good night.

I need to read posts. Just take what I can get and leave the rest.

Move a muscle, change a thought. One day at a time....and my favorite, This Too shall pass.

Yep, long winded, and that may have sabotaged me today.

Wishing strong sober days to those struggling, such as myself.

Take care.
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Re: Newbie

Postby Kitty1259 » Sat Sep 08, 2018 5:44 pm

Theo.......

Good day turned bad.

So much for that. Going offline. Tomorrow is a new day.

Thank you all for giving me my space, to just giving the space to speak my truths.

Taking it......one day at a time, and being stronger in between.
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Re: Newbie

Postby Kitty1259 » Sun Sep 09, 2018 4:52 am

I have decided writing here puts my thoughts of drinking too close to my, thoughts of drinking. Last night proved it. I was fine being sober all day. It was a good day. But discussing it gave me a craving, one that was too strong for me to fight.
That would’ve never happened if I weren’t talking about it as I was.

For many, joining groups and speaking about their own stories works. For me, it went the other way.

Thank you all for your time and kindness. I hope the next newbie comes in and finds it helpful. For me, it isn’t helpful.

Take care

I am back to day one today, Sunday, the 9th....with a little ⭐️ on my calendar, eager to begin my journey again.
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Re: Newbie

Postby Chelle » Sun Sep 09, 2018 5:15 am

Hi Kitty,
When I was newly sober I was amazed by anyone that could get 3 months of sobriety. When I asked them how they did it, they said one day at a time. Sounded trite, but now I get it. Fighting the cravings off one at a time just to get through the day. I did it by going to a lot of meetings, and having people in the program that I could call. One craving at a time i got through the day, and was able to go to bed sober. The days added up! The cravings did get less and less until they completely went away. I just had to do some simple things that the program has outlined.

I have heard a couple people say that meetings made them want to drink. I didn't experience that. I was desperate. I wanted to be sober WAY more than I wanted to be drunk, and was willing to go to any length to get it.

I didnt see anything in this thread that produced a craving for me. Perhaps a meeting would have filled the void, rather than a trip to the liquor store?

Be well.
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Re: Newbie

Postby Blue Moon » Sun Sep 09, 2018 8:29 am

Kitty1259 wrote:That would’ve never happened if I weren’t talking about it as I was.

Maybe not exactly there and then, but trying to shield an alcoholic from temptation is doomed to fail sooner or later. So ISTM your real challenge here is whether to figure such truths out now, or later.

Non-alcoholics tend not to obsess over alcohol. So the experience could teach something about whether you truly believe you are alcoholic. If you are, then having others not talk about it doesn't work because alcohol is not the problem.
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Re: Newbie

Postby Kitty1259 » Sun Sep 09, 2018 2:47 pm

Unfortunately everything I just posted came along with errors. I just can’t repeat all I wrote. I am pretty upset about it. Maybe the moderator can find the post and put it up. Very upsetting to write your heart out and it never shows up.

If I can find the thoughts and my feelings, I may be able to write it again tomorrow. If not, everyone take care and keep doing what works.

I will get there, but not by way of meetings or boards. They trigger me. I need to drink, as per cravings, when speaking of it.

Thank you for being here for me. I had hoped it would help, when in reverse, it didn’t.

Take care and hang in there.
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