Movies & TV Make AA Look Hard.

For recovery discussion

Movies & TV Make AA Look Hard.

Postby Brock » Sun Sep 02, 2018 3:15 pm

Forgive a little soap box rant, but many movies and TV shows these days like to feature someone who is in recovery, it’s a popular topic. While this could be a good thing if properly done, when it’s not true to reality I believe it makes AA look harder than it is. I have seen many meetings depicted as either a group sitting in a circle with long faces, or in a half dark basement in rows, with the same bored ‘I don’t want to be here’ look.

Worst of all is when they portray 9th step calls, I have seen people saying ‘no I will not forgive you and make life easy for you, I want you to suffer,’ and the latest episode of the new detective series ‘Take Two,’ made the 9th step look most daunting. The girl Sam is in recovery, and in a couple of scenes telling her pardner Eddie about her first 9th step efforts. Trying to get her sister to forgive her unsuccessfully, then later having a breakthrough when sister agrees to meet for coffee, but sister says the things she mentioned on the phone she wanted to apologize for, is the tip of the iceberg, sister is making a long list of stuff she will need Sam to make amends for. Then the man Eddie saying he has received quite a few 9th step calls from others, and it’s not nice having to receive such calls. Both my wife and our house guest who were watching, and know my journey, said they thought such a depiction was making steps like # 9 look almost impossible.

Bill Wilson was a man who knew the power of the media, and bent over backwards, to assist Jack Alexander doing the article which was of great help in the early days. I expect if early members like him were around today, they would ask TV and movie production houses to be kinder in depicting AA. We can rest assured the limp wristed folks at GSO will do no such thing, anytime they see a possible problem, they bend a tradition into a shape which can justify not getting involved.
"Good morning, this is your Higher Power speaking. I will not be needing your help today."
User avatar
Brock
Forums Coordinator
 
Posts: 3549
Joined: Fri Sep 07, 2012 1:45 pm

Re: Movies & TV Make AA Look Hard.

Postby Spirit Flower » Mon Sep 03, 2018 6:32 am

The entertainment industry does not know that people in general are forgiving and open to moving on. Or that bitter family members are bitter due to their own emotional problems; and we make living amends to these people.
...a score card reading zero...
User avatar
Spirit Flower
Forums Old Timer
 
Posts: 1375
Joined: Fri Feb 09, 2007 5:49 am
Location: Texas

Re: Movies & TV Make AA Look Hard.

Postby Blue Moon » Mon Sep 03, 2018 11:21 am

.... is much the same as saying the news makes life look bad. I think people are intelligent enough to understand that it's just a TV show. True, some do seem to feel their life needs to look like a TV drama, but IMO they tend to be the minority.
Ian S
AKA Blue Moon
User avatar
Blue Moon
Site Admin
 
Posts: 3663
Joined: Wed Jan 23, 2002 2:01 am
Location: New Jersey

Re: Movies & TV Make AA Look Hard.

Postby Greywolf » Tue Sep 04, 2018 9:28 am

The 9th step didn't used to be about trying to get forgiveness, it was one of 12 steps used to recover from alcoholism. Daunting is a fair description of the 9th step. Going to people you have harmed to make amends is not an easy thing to do. Doing a thorough 8th step paves the way for the 9th step -- being willing to make amends to them all.
I don't care how much you know until I know how much you care.
Greywolf
Forums Enthusiast
 
Posts: 180
Joined: Fri Apr 20, 2018 1:56 pm

Re: Movies & TV Make AA Look Hard.

Postby tomsteve » Thu Sep 06, 2018 7:10 am

reads pretty true to reality to me. meetings are like that and amends happen like that. there have been many family members alone who have been hurt pretty bad by the alcoholics actions over many years. i personally believe they have a good reason to not accept amends- theyve heard empty words for many years.
tomsteve
Forums Contributor
 
Posts: 399
Joined: Mon Oct 20, 2014 10:25 am

Re: Movies & TV Make AA Look Hard.

Postby Greywolf » Thu Sep 06, 2018 7:53 am

tomsteve wrote:reads pretty true to reality to me. meetings are like that and amends happen like that. there have been many family members alone who have been hurt pretty bad by the alcoholics actions over many years. i personally believe they have a good reason to not accept amends- theyve heard empty words for many years.


Very true. But when did amends become an apology and a promise not to do it again. Apologies are fine but an apology is not according to definitions an amends. Amends: to do something to correct a mistake that one has made or a bad situation that one has caused.

All to many times I hear alcoholics talk about making amends but in reality they are only trying to get back in the good graces of someone the have screwed up a relationship with.

Leaping ahead in the steps to "make amends" is IMO a not so good idea. Some sort of start to a spiritual awakening or maturity is needed to discern amends from attempts to get back in the good graces of someone the alcoholic has ruined the relationship through his behavior. The 9th step is not intended to be used to get back in another's good graces or back in the "big bed" so to speak.

The 9th step is one of 12 steps in the program to recover from alcoholism -- to cause a spiritual awakening. Any restored relationship is a fringe benefit.
I don't care how much you know until I know how much you care.
Greywolf
Forums Enthusiast
 
Posts: 180
Joined: Fri Apr 20, 2018 1:56 pm


Return to Discussions

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 10 guests