In a general way

For recovery discussion

In a general way

Postby kaosxtech » Mon Feb 26, 2018 11:33 pm

Tonight at my big book study group we read Doctor Bob's Nightmare and on page 177 of the big book it says, "I will not take space to relate all my hospital or sanitarium experiences." It got me to thinking about my share when I go on an H&I panel. I tell what it was like, what happened, and what it is like now. I believe I am sharing in a general way; however, I am always up to improve the experience, strength and hope I am sharing. Maybe my drunkalog is taking up to much of my story, or maybe its not in depth enough. What is a good break up % wise of a share. (25% what it was like) (50% What happened) (25% what it is like now). I just like hearing other alcoholics input. I am probably over thinking it...there i go thinking again lol.
Selfishness—self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles. (Alcoholics Anonymous, page 62)
User avatar
Forums Enthusiast
Posts: 22
Joined: Sun Feb 25, 2018 2:32 pm

Re: In a general way

Postby Blue Moon » Tue Feb 27, 2018 5:30 am

I wouldn't get hung up on %ages, because that indicates you're not talking from the heart. It also ignores the human factor - depending on how you're feeling that day, you may have less or more recovery to share. Just let your HP guide the flow.

You only really need to share enough of "what it was like" to trigger identification. Beyond that, it's noise. Everyone knows how to get drunk. Some like hearing the drunkalogue or funny stories, but that's not the same as it helping them to stay sober. What they really need to hear is the solution, once you have their attention.

Above all, remember that your sharing only keeps 1 person sober.
Ian S
AKA Blue Moon
User avatar
Blue Moon
Forums Old Timer
Posts: 3677
Joined: Wed Jan 23, 2002 2:01 am
Location: New Jersey

Re: In a general way

Postby tomsteve » Wed Feb 28, 2018 1:26 pm

kaosxtech wrote:Maybe my drunkalog is taking up to much of my story, or maybe its not in depth enough. What is a good break up % wise of a share. (25% what it was like) (50% What happened) (25% what it is like now). I just like hearing other alcoholics input. I am probably over thinking it...there i go thinking again lol.

personally i dont do drunkalogues- people at meetings already know how to drink.
i do thinkalogues- the thinking when i was drinking, the thinking that led me to AA, and the thinking through the years of recovery.
Forums Contributor
Posts: 431
Joined: Mon Oct 20, 2014 10:25 am

Re: In a general way

Postby avaneesh912 » Wed Feb 28, 2018 1:30 pm

The big book in the chapter talks about throwing couple drunk escapades just to lure the newcomer into listening and then it talks about dwelling on the struggle to stay stopped. It all depends on the audience.
Show him, from your own experience, how the peculiar mental condition surrounding that first drink prevents normal functioning of the will power (Alcoholics Anonymous, Page 92)
User avatar
Trusted Servant
Posts: 5007
Joined: Fri May 30, 2008 12:22 pm
Location: Atlanta, GA

Re: In a general way

Postby D'oh » Wed Feb 28, 2018 6:19 pm

Wow! I have never really thought that deeply about any of my Shares. I do recite the 3rd Step Prayer to myself at the end of the Traditions Reading.

If anything, I think I wind up reflecting on the first 2 paragraphs of How it Works the Most "Completely give themselves to this Simple Program" Nobody offered any Kool Aid glasses, and that I didn't have to figure out "Why". A "Very Simple Program, for Very Complex Thinkers." "Utilize what the program has to offer, rather than Analyzing Why it works"
Forums Long Timer
Posts: 816
Joined: Sun Jul 26, 2015 10:51 am

Re: In a general way

Postby positrac » Thu Mar 01, 2018 3:24 am

People know how to drink which led them to AA; either by choice or by the court system and to help with the comparing out I have used some of my story about the consequences of my actions drunk. I thought it couldn't happen to me until it did and then what was I going to do?

I used to take meetings and chair the jail/28 day rehab and they were separated and so the personalities were the same all of them looking for a quick fix and or an easy way out. I'd see several of the same people rolling in and out and they'd be surprised to see me and they'd ask why are you still coming here? I'd say because I am giving back to AA, you all keep me sober because it proves nothing has changed out in the drinking world and hopefully you'll realize you have a problem and I am your assisted answer on how to change your life if you want it.
Those meetings were very frustrating because I wanted it more than they did. I prayed for a lot of acceptance in that area as to just give the message and not take it personally as they are just drunks and I too did the same thing until I had enough and wanted what they had in AA.
Work hard, stay positive, and get up early. It's the best part of the day.
George Allen, Sr.
User avatar
Trusted Servant
Posts: 1301
Joined: Wed Oct 29, 2014 4:03 am

Re: In a general way

Postby 1Peter5:10 » Mon Mar 05, 2018 6:03 pm

My own story involves such pitiful symptoms and very very heavy drinking at the end, ( 1.75 liters of vodka a day, saving just enough vodka for tomorrow so I could drink before the liquor store opened. Day after day 4 years dysfunctional, on the couch. . . not working in years, etc.).that when sharing my story, I can generally fast forward to that part and my "credits," are well established.

I guess we all have our 'blessings.'
Forums Enthusiast
Posts: 102
Joined: Mon Nov 27, 2017 8:56 pm

Re: In a general way

Postby Roberth » Thu Mar 22, 2018 11:54 am

Our stories disclose in a general way what we used to be like, what happened, and what we are like now. Pg 58

To me what means is to let the new-comer know some of the things I did so they can relate to me. I don’t need to go into all the gory details when why I came to AA and what I did for recovery.

I will tell you this that if I hadn’t heard my story coming out of someone else’s mouth I am not sure I would have made it to 90 days let alone 26 years. It wasn’t so much of what he said but that he was like me and he was sober. I knew I could stay sober too. That was March 27 1992 and I was able to accept a 90 day chip 3 days later because it him.

As soon as I hear some telling me what I have to do I shut them off but then the tell me what they are doing they capture my interest
Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in pretty, well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out and loudly proclaiming WOW What a ride!!!!
User avatar
Forums Long Timer
Posts: 703
Joined: Wed Jun 18, 2008 2:53 pm
Location: In The High Desert of California

Re: In a general way

Postby PaigeB » Fri Mar 23, 2018 12:48 pm

Identifying or "what is was like" BONDS us. Sometimes it brings laughter & seldom tears... a lot of nodding by the listeners. I know that I listen with my heart and I am not learning to drink... I am remembering the TRUTH about the fantasy that sometimes strikes me... That some day I will Control & Enjoy the drink. But alas, I hear yet another person like me for whom the drink is no longer a solution, though sometimes our antics are comically tragic.

It is absolutely necessary to Identify with the audience ~ it is our common denominator.

What happened - the bitter end... the epiphany... the phone call... That Point in Time Where the Light Came On. Give me the chills and brings tears to my eyes when I remember it... This too is a necessary component in the machinery of my story. Even if you have heard it before, every time I tell it It comes out in a different color.

What it is like now? Wow. I always find people do not save enough time for the Hope this brings. Yes, again there is the machinery of Working the Steps and tidbits I have learned that pop into my mind to sustain me. The 10th Step stuff... "Love & tolerance... We ceased fighting..." Then, I must speak the difficult to articulate path to my Personal Higher Power. THAT is the purpose of our Book and essential to recovery.

If I can go from There to HERE ~ You can too. What it is like now is full of Hope & Gratitude.

Thanks for the Opportunity to Share.
Step 6 is "AA's way of stating, the best possible attitude one can take in order to make a beginning on this lifetime job... with most of them we shall have to be content with patient improvement." 12&12 Step Six, p.65
User avatar
Forums Old Timer
Posts: 7966
Joined: Fri Jun 24, 2011 12:28 pm
Location: Iowa USA

Return to Discussions

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 8 guests