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Newcomer

Postby Clarissssa » Thu Jun 07, 2018 8:07 am

Hi my name is Clarisa and I’m new to this website. I’m looking for support and someone to talk to.
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Re: Newcomer

Postby positrac » Thu Jun 07, 2018 9:00 am

Welcome and I know we have folks who can answer, listen and even provide suggestions to you regarding alcohol.
Work hard, stay positive, and get up early. It's the best part of the day.
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Re: Newcomer

Postby Brock » Thu Jun 07, 2018 10:04 am

Welcome here Clarisa.

Apart from being new to the site, I don’t know if you are new to AA as well. The suggestion is always to also attend live meetings if they are available in your area, and try a few different ones because they vary, you will feel more comfortable in some than in others. Then you can be a ‘regular’ in the one you like best, and perhaps do a bit of service which helps us feel at home, and also look for a sponsor to take you through the steps. I like to mention, because some new people are scared that they will be sitting in meetings every day for life, that the accent on meetings is only at the start, it’s to get the steps done and the craving for drink removed, after that you can choose to go as much as you want to, I personally average one meeting per week where I try to help others.

In case you are not familiar with any AA literature, I will put up some links to stuff you can read when you have the time, also on you tube there are lots of resources, you can type in ‘AA speakers’ and listen, or ‘Big Book study’ and follow along with your book, (the big book is something you should have). And here you can ask any question or make any comment, we love having new folks, it helps us as well.

PS. I just saw you had another post under the topic ‘Hospital Stays,’ where you helped someone with good advise. We failed to approve that post at the same time as this, all future posts won’t need approval, it’s only the first because we get a fair amount of spam.

And this means that you are not new to AA, so what I said above is probably stuff you know already, anyhow no harm, someone else may benefit from it as well.



Is A.A. For You – 12 Questions.
http://www.aa.org/pages/en_US/is-aa-for ... can-answer

A Brief Guide To AA.
http://www.aa.org/assets/en_US/p-42_abriefguidetoaa.pdf

Three Chapters From The Big Book-

1.The Doctors Opinion.
http://www.aa.org/assets/en_US/en_bigbo ... pinion.pdf

2.There Is A Solution.
http://www.aa.org/assets/en_US/en_bigbook_chapt2.pdf

3.More About Alcoholism.
http://www.aa.org/assets/en_US/en_bigbook_chapt3.pdf

A.A. Meeting Finder.
A.A. Near You.
http://www.aa.org/pages/en_US/find-aa-resources
"Good morning, this is your Higher Power speaking. I will not be needing your help today."
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Re: Newcomer

Postby PaigeB » Thu Jun 07, 2018 11:55 am

Hi Clarisa! My name is Paige and I am an alcoholic. My Home Group is Women into Action on Monday nights.

Have you been to a meeting yet? Brock listed the meeting finder in his list of resources for you! Check it out.
If I'm not able to say how I'm working my program today, then I'm not working my program.
The e-AA Group's 7th Tradition link: www.e-aa.org/group_seventh.php
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Re: Newcomer

Postby Dunca » Thu Jun 07, 2018 12:39 pm

I am always a newcomer. I am not new to this Program but I have one year and a half back. I had 11 years at one point, then went out for 2 1/2 years, then back to A.A. for two years, then out again for 2 weeks this time and now my 1 year and a half back. I find this program to be very easy and difficult at the same time. It is easy when I break it down to "One Day at a Time" and "Keep it Simple" but when I start getting a bad attitude is when I want to go back out. I really need support from this website I so happily found last night.

Thanks guys.
I just want to say thank you to any and all that try to help me. I really want to stay sober and I have a bad track record. I keep coming back though!
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Re: Newcomer

Postby Brock » Thu Jun 07, 2018 2:14 pm

Welcome here Dunca.

I have a bit of an in and out history myself, but not quite like your 11 years, more of a years sobriety here and there over a 30 year period, never doing the step work just warming the chairs at meetings. Finally accepted the solution nearly nine years ago, and not really thought of drinking since.

I like the part where you say - “ when I start getting a bad attitude is when I want to go back out,” I am a great fan of the suggestion in the chapter ‘Into Action’ - “As we go through the day we pause, when agitated or doubtful, and ask for the right thought or action.” I usually am doing that a few times every day.
"Good morning, this is your Higher Power speaking. I will not be needing your help today."
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Re: Newcomer

Postby Dunca » Sat Jun 09, 2018 11:53 am

I liked what Brock had to say. But the thing is, I never have to say one day back ever again. I've tested the water too many times. When I had the 11 years I PLANNED my relapse for 11 years from then cause I knew in that time frame my daughter would go to college and then I could drink. And I did exactly that. Makes me sick really cause I got worse than ever but thank God I'm back now. I do need to get to more meetings though. I got a phone call from someone in the Program yesterday asking me if I "still went to meetings" I was so defensive I yelled "Yes!" but I think I yelled and got a resentment cause the person was right. I find I'm only "defensive" when I'm doing something wrong. This is a big clue for me. I need to get back on course.
I just want to say thank you to any and all that try to help me. I really want to stay sober and I have a bad track record. I keep coming back though!
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Re: Newcomer

Postby Brock » Sat Jun 09, 2018 1:55 pm

I mean this in the best possible way, but to my mind if someone is thinking, (worse yet planning), a relapse at all, especially for 11 years, I can’t help but believe they never ‘got’ what the program offers. Early on I went to a meeting and said that I had seen on TV someone talking of a new pill, which promised people like us could drink and enjoy without overdoing it. About half the room laughed, the other half like me looked on in shock, why are they laughing, when we might have a way out of this no drinking for life sentence we wondered.

One of the older ones who was laughing, said I should come back and let them know, when they invent a pill which not only controlled how much we drank, but also made them more serene and happier than they had ever been before. I didn’t quite understand then, but certainly do now, and my belief is if anyone in AA was suddenly ‘cured’ of alcoholism, and could drink like a normal person, and the person decided to do that, then they never got what the program promises.

I admire the wish to get back on course, but that course has to be one which leads to a spiritual awakening and a life of peace, what the book refers to as ‘happy joyous and free,’ that even if we could drink we would say no, because it would probably dull our senses and ruin the joy of life we presently feel. Some might say I am talking crap, but I guarantee that there are very many who won’t, because they will have gotten the full benefit of this wonderful program.

Going back to the meetings is fine, but I worry if someone feels meetings are what will keep them happily sober. We do the steps and live in the solution of #’s 10 & 11, and live by the principles of 12, and spreading the message so others may be helped, is the only reason I believe a recovered alcoholic goes to any meetings, that and the fact that some of them can become quite enjoyable to attend.

Sorry but I can get quite soap box preachy at times, it’s just that I believe someone has to remind AA newcomers, and old timers who missed the mark, that the silly saying ‘meeting makers make it,’ only refers to making it through the steps, after that we live in the solution of a rocking spiritual existence, that drinking could never hold a candle to.
"Good morning, this is your Higher Power speaking. I will not be needing your help today."
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Re: Newcomer

Postby Spirit Flower » Sun Jun 10, 2018 12:08 pm

When I had the 11 years I PLANNED my relapse for 11 years from then cause I knew in that time frame my daughter would go to college and then I could drink. And I did exactly that.
Check out the story of the carpet slipper guy in the Big Book page 32.
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Re: Newcomer

Postby Spirit Flower » Sun Jun 10, 2018 12:10 pm

when I start getting a bad attitude is when I want to go back out
I don't know why people go back out but strongly suggest it has to do with the spiritual life. Our program requires us to grow spiritually.
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Re: Newcomer

Postby Spirit Flower » Sun Jun 10, 2018 12:15 pm

even if we could drink we would say no, because it would probably dull our senses and ruin the joy of life we presently feel
I strongly agree. From a vibrational angle, the more pure / uncorrupted my mental and physical vibrations, the better the conscious contact.
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Re: Newcomer

Postby Spirit Flower » Sun Jun 10, 2018 12:17 pm

With almost 33 years, I still go to a couple of meetings a week. I do this because AA is a fellowship; something I belong to not just something to take away from.
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