How many meetings do you attend?

Got an issue with someone or something? Want to whine a little? Here's the place to do it, or to get to know folks, or ask those questions that don't fit anywhere else.
Post Reply
Soberguy27
Forums Enthusiast
Posts: 64
Joined: Fri Sep 15, 2017 9:29 am

How many meetings do you attend?

Post by Soberguy27 » Sun Aug 26, 2018 9:04 pm

When I first got sober, I went to a meeting every day, sometimes two a day. As the days and years past by my attendance at meetings has dropped. In the first ten years it was at least three to four meetings a week. After 15 years it went down to two or three meetings a week. Now at 28 years sober I find that two or three meetings a month feels good. I know some would say it should be more than that but, I have always felt like being sober meant more than spending my life in meetings. It meant being a productive member of society and not just the aa society. AA gave me a life and I feel like I should now live it and enjoy it.
I have not forgotten what gave me this life and am still pretty active with sponsorship but my attendance at meetings has dropped quite a bit. I feel good and happy and free. I am enjoying my life with my family and friends and feel the amount of meetings I attend seems to be enough. What are your thoughts on this and how many meetings do you attend weekly or monthly. Please know that it's rare that I would go more than two or three weeks without a meeting.

User avatar
Blue Moon
Forums Old Timer
Posts: 3677
Joined: Wed Jan 23, 2002 2:01 am
Location: New Jersey

Re: How many meetings do you attend?

Post by Blue Moon » Sun Aug 26, 2018 10:27 pm

When I feel my attendance waning, I pick up a commitment. This keeps me regular to the weekly schedule. In difficult times, I increase my attendance.

Sobriety remains the most important thing to me, whether or not I'm in a meeting.
Ian S
AKA Blue Moon

User avatar
Spirit Flower
Forums Old Timer
Posts: 1429
Joined: Fri Feb 09, 2007 5:49 am
Location: Texas

Re: How many meetings do you attend?

Post by Spirit Flower » Mon Aug 27, 2018 1:55 am

I go to about 2 a week. I probably would go to more but during the week I don't have time.
I enjoy the meetings (even after 33 years).
...a score card reading zero...

User avatar
Brock
Forums Coordinator
Posts: 3773
Joined: Fri Sep 07, 2012 1:45 pm

Re: How many meetings do you attend?

Post by Brock » Mon Aug 27, 2018 8:07 am

I have lots of time, retired, no kids, just me and my wife, but still one or two meetings per week is fine for me. I don’t go because I feel I need or have to, I quite enjoy the couple I have selected and fit in chores after, like tomorrow morning 9.30 meeting and after to the meat shop for our weekly supply. Once the steps are done I can’t understand why anyone would need meetings to stay sober, it’s none of my business that some appear to, although I get hot under the collar when they advise newcomers that meetings are essential for sobriety.

Probably the person who helped me most, was someone I only saw at one meeting each week when I was new, because so many others were there every day and boasted long term sobriety, I thought I had to choose between regular meetings for life, or maybe die of alcoholism, and I so disliked the meetings that death didn’t look that bad. Anyway this person put me on the right track, the book says we stay sober and happy by maintaining our spiritual condition, and I don’t find meetings help me do that.

Basically, I am against anyone being made to feel they have to force themselves to do anything in AA, at one time I was worried that I had to force reading the book or doing daily meditation each morning, and was getting nothing out of it anyway. A person right here said when he didn’t feel like doing it, he just looked upward and said ‘thank you’ or similar words, and went about his day just fine, I now use that when it’s all I’m in the mood for. The book says - “We relax and take it easy. We don't struggle. We are often surprised how the right answers come after we have tried this for a while. What used to be the hunch or the occasional inspiration gradually becomes a working part of the mind.” If they felt the answers would come by going to meetings or forcing prayer they would say so, we should by now know ourselves well, we know what the promise of being happy and free feels like. Anytime we don’t feel that way we do like they say, ‘relax and take it easy,’ look inward and find what thought or problem generated by our mind is ruining our serenity, and drop it like a hot potato. If we don’t know how to do this we learn, that’s why the big book says things like, “there are many helpful books also,” if it were written today it might say helpful TV and you tube also. Getting ourselves spirituality aligned with something, we will instantly know when we are off the beam, and have the tools to get back on, then when we do go to meetings, we aren’t going for the selfish reason of getting help for our self, we will be the example newcomers can look up to.

Sorry about the long ramble, it’s a side effect of retirement and older age.
"Good morning, this is your Higher Power speaking. I will not be needing your help today."

User avatar
Spirit Flower
Forums Old Timer
Posts: 1429
Joined: Fri Feb 09, 2007 5:49 am
Location: Texas

Re: How many meetings do you attend?

Post by Spirit Flower » Mon Aug 27, 2018 9:36 am

But Brock, you ARE enlarging your spiritual life. I know this because you read books like those of E. Tolle, or R. Rohr.

So, IMO, meetings or no meetings, everyone should enlarge their spiritual life. And, without this, yes meetings would be boring and we'd be saying the same thing at every meeting.
...a score card reading zero...

User avatar
Brock
Forums Coordinator
Posts: 3773
Joined: Fri Sep 07, 2012 1:45 pm

Re: How many meetings do you attend?

Post by Brock » Mon Aug 27, 2018 10:42 am

Yes of course you are right, we continue to enlarge our spiritual life as it says in #11, I read a fair amount, and see nature and things around where I live in a new light. I am grateful to AA for the spiritual experience which took away the obsession to drink, building on that experience is what has given me a life better than I could have hoped for.
"Good morning, this is your Higher Power speaking. I will not be needing your help today."

User avatar
PaigeB
Forums Old Timer
Posts: 8016
Joined: Fri Jun 24, 2011 12:28 pm
Location: Iowa USA

Re: How many meetings do you attend?

Post by PaigeB » Mon Aug 27, 2018 11:33 am

I just got my 9 year chip. I have a homegroup that I attend every week hell or high water - and I have had them both!

Other than that, I have 2 more meetings that I try to attend regularly - Thurs & Friday evenings. I keep an open mind for a Tuesday meeting. Since my first 90 days I have not really attended on Wednesday or Saturday, reserving those for family. Sunday is open, but I am usually busy or tired, LOL.

I am here on E-aa everyday that I can be ~ at least to read new posts, but mostly for the Daily Reflection forum.

I love AA. I love the Fellowship and it is my experience that I get something there that I cannot get in my outside community or online. I instantly feel more loving and compassionate when my homegroup gals start to filter in. If I am lucky, I get to take the feeling home with me, but at least I can take home some more ES&H than I had when I left the house. I truly enjoy meetings. They feed my Soul. I love AA and I hope I can live it everyday in all my affairs.
Step 6 is "AA's way of stating, the best possible attitude one can take in order to make a beginning on this lifetime job... with most of them we shall have to be content with patient improvement." 12&12 Step Six, p.65

D'oh
Forums Long Timer
Posts: 821
Joined: Sun Jul 26, 2015 10:51 am

Re: How many meetings do you attend?

Post by D'oh » Mon Aug 27, 2018 9:03 pm

It is easy to let up on the spiritual program of action and rest on our laurels. We are headed for trouble if we do, for alcohol is a subtle foe. We are not cured of alcoholism. What we really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition. Every day is a day when we must carry the vision of God’s will into all of our activities. “How can I best serve Thee—Thy will (not mine) be done.’’ These are thoughts which must go with us constantly. We can exercise our will power along this line all we wish. It is the proper use of the will.
pg 85

I got caught with this, I had a chance to live the 10-15 years of Literal Hell, and by the Grace of a HP make it back.

My HP works in the rooms. I once Sponsored a Member who said "If his HP called him on the phone, he would probably Hang Up" I need to hear it from "Others" to not get "My Will" confused with "My HP's Will." I attend 2 min, 3 often, and times 4-5 meeting a week.

Greywolf
Forums Contributor
Posts: 211
Joined: Fri Apr 20, 2018 1:56 pm

Re: How many meetings do you attend?

Post by Greywolf » Tue Aug 28, 2018 6:37 am

Soberguy27 wrote:When I first got sober, I went to a meeting every day, sometimes two a day. As the days and years past by my attendance at meetings has dropped. In the first ten years it was at least three to four meetings a week. After 15 years it went down to two or three meetings a week.
Pretty much exactly how it was for me.

At about 7 years I realized I wasn't going to meetings to stay sober but to help others achieve sobriety. One, then another had asked me to be their sponsor which made going to my home group and a few others my pigeons and friends attended, my routine . It's what I do now -- my home group and an occasional outlier. My current pigeon and I spend about 2 hours talking after our meeting on Wednesday.

To be clear I do not go to meetings to stay sober, I go to help others achieve sobriety. It's a quaint idea but there are many old farts like myself who think trying to have a spiritual awakening without a base of sobriety is putting the cart before the horse. I observed AAers helping people stop drinking in 1946-47 when my dad came in.

I shared my bedroom with drunks sleeping off a drunk when I was 9 or 10 years old. My dad told me helping another drunk was how he stayed sober. He also made it clear letting the person he was trying to help use the other bed was my choice. I vaguely remember it but I do recall the general uplifting feeling I got from helping someone that way.

There weren't many meeting choices in those days and I think my dad went to one a week but he and his friends would gather around the kitchen table and drink coffee and talk AA almost every evening it seems. That's pretty much how it is with me now. Go to one or 2 meetings a week but talk to my AA friends at least once a day.
I don't care how much you know until I know how much you care.

User avatar
avaneesh912
Trusted Servant
Posts: 5020
Joined: Fri May 30, 2008 12:22 pm
Location: Atlanta, GA

Re: How many meetings do you attend?

Post by avaneesh912 » Tue Aug 28, 2018 7:42 am

Four at this moment. Would like to do more, perhaps when I retire. Of all the meetings the meeting we take into the correction facility is the most fulfilling. There are some people sincerely looking for solution. Wish all of them would attend, but we are glad that those who show up, mostly do it on their own. Some to get there due to dirty urine. One of them had a spiritual awaken last week, until now, he was thinking he could still do it on his own. Finally he realized the powerlessness concept that AA talks about.
Show him, from your own experience, how the peculiar mental condition surrounding that first drink prevents normal functioning of the will power (Alcoholics Anonymous, Page 92)

User avatar
positrac
Forums Old Timer
Posts: 1301
Joined: Wed Oct 29, 2014 4:03 am

Re: How many meetings do you attend?

Post by positrac » Wed Aug 29, 2018 3:04 am

I went everyday I could and this included foreign countries; then over time I chaired two meetings which were as Bill see's it and BB study, I took in a rehab facility once a week and with all this work it did become a stretch and my growth in the program told me to back off some of my duties and recharge. I am in touch with sober members in my world and I hit a meeting on occasion and if I am really on fire and need to get other perspectives from the room even if I just listen.

If a gun was at my head over meeting attendance I would be dead because I use what I need and leave the rest. (disclaimer) For the new comer I believe it is important to find your area and do not use my methods or terms for meeting attendance because I am tried and tested over the years. I am not cured, yet I am very aware of my senses and what I need to do for sobriety in my life.
Work hard, stay positive, and get up early. It's the best part of the day.
George Allen, Sr.

Post Reply