Smoking Weed

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allan c
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Smoking Weed

Post by allan c » Thu Feb 11, 2016 11:20 pm

I've been without a drink for 7 years, go to several meetings a week and even served as DCM for a couple years. I recently came off a 8 month weed experiment. Though my life did not become nearly as unimaginable as it did with drinking, I did find myself emotionally regressing. That in addition to having to keep it a secret from my closest friends inspired me to stop. It was not difficult and I have not had any desire to return to it. I am a musician and used it for that purpose. The payoff was not worth the price, however, so I simply Quite. I have not come clean in meetings though and it eats at me a bit. I do believe it's an outside issue and that it's a slippery slope to step outside the primary purpose. I also realize that many will consider that a rationalization so allow me to use our Bill Wilson as an example.

In the 1950's, as many of us know, bill spent a couple years doing a lot of LSD. Like weed, it is a hallucinogenic but far more powerful. In addition, his conversion experience in towns hospital in the 1930's happened while he was undergoing the Belladonna treatment. For those that don't know, this treatment involves two very potent hallucinogenics. Anyone who takes the Belladonna treatment has a very similar experience. So you see my point. Bill never apologized for his drug use and obviously, never changed his sobriety date. I think we're in dangerous territory when we begin determining what constitutes a mind altering substance. What about nicotine, gambling, sick relationships etc. All these use the same pleasure centers in the brain and are generally far more detrimental than my failed weed experiment.

Ultimately, I probably will come clean in the group and change my sobriety date. If nothing else, the humility will do me some good and since AA is a community that I'm very much a part of, keeping it a secret would create walls that I've worked very hard to bring down. And don't get me wrong, I'm not advocating the use of drugs. It was not good for me emotionally and spiritually. That's why I stopped. I would discourage anyone who is thinking of it. At the very least, it was wasted time. I does, however, dishearten me that as a fellowship we have begun to pass judgment on those who make these choices. Bill always said that AA will only perish if we fail to stick to our primary purpose. And Bill, himself, was high as a kite during at least a portion of his sobriety. I'm just curious where others weigh in on this issue. Thanks and God bless.

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PaigeB
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Re: Smoking Weed

Post by PaigeB » Thu Feb 11, 2016 11:57 pm

I am going to move this thread about smoking pot to the If It Doesn't Fit Anywhere Else Forum.
Step 6 is "AA's way of stating, the best possible attitude one can take in order to make a beginning on this lifetime job... with most of them we shall have to be content with patient improvement." 12&12 Step Six, p.65

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Tosh
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Re: Smoking Weed

Post by Tosh » Fri Feb 12, 2016 1:09 am

allan c wrote: In the 1950's, as many of us know, bill spent a couple years doing a lot of LSD. Like weed, it is a hallucinogenic but far more powerful. In addition, his conversion experience in towns hospital in the 1930's happened while he was undergoing the Belladonna treatment. For those that don't know, this treatment involves two very potent hallucinogenics. Anyone who takes the Belladonna treatment has a very similar experience. So you see my point. Bill never apologized for his drug use and obviously, never changed his sobriety date.
If you read Not God: A History of Alcoholic's Anonymous by Ernest Kurtz, he explains in some detail why Bill experimented with LSD. From the book, Bill wasn't taking LSD for recreational purposes and (from memory), I'm pretty sure he did it alongside some medical practitioners who were involved with the experiment. LSD at the time wasn't thought of as some street drug, but as a psychiatric medicine.

As for Belladonna treatment, again, he was prescribed that by a doctor.

So I think trying to justify smoking pot using Bill as an example to follow is a bit misplaced. And I know Bill W wasn't a perfect man too.

Welcome to the forum, Allen.

Regards

Tosh
Come, come, whoever you are. Wanderer, worshiper, lover of leaving. It doesn't matter. Ours is not a caravan of despair. Come, even if you have broken your vows a thousand times. Come, yet again, come, come.” Rumi (No sniggering from the sex addicts)

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avaneesh912
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Re: Smoking Weed

Post by avaneesh912 » Fri Feb 12, 2016 4:52 am

I'm just curious where others weigh in on this issue.
Is it really going to help? You are going to be more pissed at people who don't side with your opinion. We have seen this over and over again. Go within, see what the God within you tells you. Do according to that.
Show him, from your own experience, how the peculiar mental condition surrounding that first drink prevents normal functioning of the will power (Alcoholics Anonymous, Page 92)

Reborn
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Re: Smoking Weed

Post by Reborn » Fri Feb 12, 2016 7:42 pm

Its about doing the right thing...like avaneesh said you have to tap that inner resource(higher power...God as you understand him) and ask yourself if you're doing the right thing. When I try to justify, rationalize or defend my behavior I'm not doing the right thing. You'll never have to justify, rationalize or defend what is right.
We have recovered, and have been given the power to help others. BB pg 132

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Brock
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Re: Smoking Weed

Post by Brock » Sat Feb 13, 2016 5:25 am

It does, however, dishearten me that as a fellowship we have begun to pass judgment on those who make these choices.
I agree, on one hand we say these things are an outside issue if someone brings them up, and on the other we judge. It is something which has been evident for quite a while however, a well known weekend retreat by Chuck C in 1975, which was converted to a popular book, “A New Pair of Glasses,” near the start he says something like hello I'm Chuck, and I haven't had a drink or a pill in 32 years.

Chris R also speaks about pills sometimes, but at least he qualifies it by always saying if your doctor says take it please do, and on here I have seen particularly ladies, make comments about other ladies, who supposedly carry what they call 'grandma’s little helpers' in their handbags. I wonder if it's possible that they look so relaxed and serene from working a good program, but others who haven't found that peace feel that could not be done naturally, so therefore they must have a pile of Valium in the bag.

I agree in this case about looking inside to see what's right for you. Since living this new life I have found that the old sayings we were bought up with make new sense, the grass is always greener and do unto others and so on, the one that says 'let your conscience be your guide' has been the most useful to me. I use it to decide things in many steps, should I make an amend here, apologize to this one or that, is this really a defect of character to get rid of, everyone has a different level of right and wrong, so my rule is if it's troubling me, weighing on my mind, do what it takes to get rid of it. And as Reborn said, usually when I start having to justify and rationalize, then I know it's weighing on my mind, if I can't forget it I need to get rid of it.
"Good morning, this is your Higher Power speaking. I will not be needing your help today."

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tyg
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Re: Smoking Weed

Post by tyg » Sat Feb 13, 2016 2:38 pm

A gift AA has given me(available to all) is that I am more and more able to be true to my self and not let what others think about me stop me from doing what I need to do to grow and change, spiritually and otherwise.

I look at sobriety as a whole, regardless of the substance(s) abused...weed, shopping, Sloth, gambling, sex, alcohol etc. Recovery is about being free from it all, not just alcohol. Regardless of the fellowship we are in, the 12 Step program(based off AA) allows us to break free from all addiction and unmanageable areas in our life. But it is a process and we shouldn't give up on it when things don't suit us like we want.
I recently came off a 8 month weed experiment.
Bill W was under close medical supervision in hopes to recover from his depression disorder. During this 8 month weed experiment were you prescribed medical marijuana by a Doctor and closely supervised by them to monitor the outcome? If not, than there is no comparison to you and Bill W.. Those darn Character defects work hard in trying to justify things and avoid being honest with others.

I have found that my secrets will stop me from growing and being content. When I am able to be completely honest about me and my life, my journey in sobriety, then I can become free from all the bondage's of myself. Until then, my life will slowly backslide and become unmanageable. Little by little, it spreads and starts infecting all areas of my life....and others too.
~The secret to the AA program is the first three words on page 112~

allan c
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Re: Smoking Weed

Post by allan c » Sun Feb 14, 2016 9:16 pm

Thanks for the feedback guys. Looks like coming clean is the general consensus. It falls into the category of something that I don't want to do but will much happier once I do. It's all about my ego. Though AA has gone to great lengths to keep status out of the equation, it's still humiliating to admit i faltered. Again, I really appreciate everyone's feedback. By and large, the message was consistent. Makes it easy for me to figure out what God's will is on this matter. Thanks

Sleddog75
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Re: Smoking Weed

Post by Sleddog75 » Sun Mar 27, 2016 6:16 am

AA is about abstinence from Alcohol, building a relationship with God through the 12 steps to eliminate the desire to drink so we can get on with our lives. Who cares if you smoked some pot. How does that have anything to do with abstinence from alcohol? Just on a side note, in my opinion, if it has effected your relationship with a God of your understanding you might wanna make that S*** right again...however that might look. Just my two cents. If it's a real problem go to NA

Sled

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