Sponsorship query.

Most of us who recovered with AA's program did so with the help of a "sponsor". But what is sponsorship? How do I get one? Who can be a sponsor? What makes a good sponsor?
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PaigeB
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Re: Sponsorship query.

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Mike O wrote:
Mon Jun 29, 2020 1:18 am
I suppose we all use our own experience. I used the book, literally. I did nothing more or less than was asked in the book and this didn't include sponsors or homework or anything like that.
Yes AA can be done as a loner. Surely many of those early folks did it that way. The Traditions was first published in 1946 in the Grapevine, but we don't just toss those to the side because the went unmentioned at the first printing of the Big Book.

In 1953, when the book, 12 Steps and 12 Traditions, was first published, Sponsors are mentioned casually (as if we all know what it is) in Step 2: At this juncture, his A.A. sponsor usually laughs. I have always heard that the 12&12 was written after we got some experience under our collective belt. Why would I not want to hear and use that experience?

It is as it is. We each have our own personal path to forge. There are no rules. Only suggestions. :arrow: :idea: :arrow:
Cling to the thought that, in God's hands, the dark past is the greatest possession you have - the key to life and happiness for others. With it you can avert death and misery for them. page 124 BB

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Re: Sponsorship query.

Post by Mike O »

PaigeB wrote:
Mon Jun 29, 2020 11:01 am

Yes AA can be done as a loner. Surely many of those early folks did it that way. The Traditions was first published in 1946 in the Grapevine, but we don't just toss those to the side because the went unmentioned at the first printing of the Big Book.
Of course. I’m not suggesting that anything should be tossed aside. In fact, I never recommend anybody specifically to do the steps alone and not attend face-to-face meetings. It works for me but my experience is that most need help and face-to-face meetings. My original post was not arguing against sponsorship.
😁

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Spirit Flower
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Re: Sponsorship query.

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FYI Mike, I was here when you got started and I've always been impressed with your sobriety. You must be doing something right.
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PaigeB
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Re: Sponsorship query.

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Mike O wrote:
Mon Jun 29, 2020 12:09 pm
It works for me but my experience is that most need help and face-to-face meetings. My original post was not arguing against sponsorship.
😁
I apologize. I have not been the exact picture of spirituality lately. I know that you meant no harm and I should have taken care to convey that! Your experience is VITAL to the newcomer! Especially in these times of isolation.

Much love to you and yours.
Cling to the thought that, in God's hands, the dark past is the greatest possession you have - the key to life and happiness for others. With it you can avert death and misery for them. page 124 BB

innermost
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Re: Sponsorship query.

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I would say that the following quote below explains many things about us alcoholics.
After examining our plight it is a wonder we can assist in helping another.
But we are works in (spiritual) progress and our HP has all power
and some of us do manage to stay sober. With or without a sponsor.
The EGO/self is a hard beast to keep in check.
So of course you can find all sorts of defects in sponsorship and sponsee-ship.
Selfishness - self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles.
Driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity,
we step on the toes of our fellows and they retaliate. Sometimes they hurt us, seemingly without provocation,
but we invariably find that at some time in the past we have made decisions
based on self which later placed us in a position to be hurt.

So our troubles, we think, are basically of our own making. They arise out of ourselves,
and the alcoholic is an extreme example of self-will run riot, though he usually doesn't think so.
Above everything, we alcoholics must be rid of this selfishness. We must, or it kills us! God makes that possible.
And there often seems no way of entirely getting rid of self without His aid.
Many of us had moral and philosophical convictions galore, but we could not live up to them even though we would have liked to.
Neither could we reduce our self-centeredness much by wishing or trying on our own power. We had to have God's help.
The first 164 pg. is the program!

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Re: Sponsorship query.

Post by Mike O »

Spirit Flower wrote:
Mon Jun 29, 2020 2:07 pm
FYI Mike, I was here when you got started and I've always been impressed with your sobriety. You must be doing something right.
I'm only doing what the book describes :)

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Re: Sponsorship query.

Post by Mike O »

PaigeB wrote:
Tue Jun 30, 2020 2:06 pm
Mike O wrote:
Mon Jun 29, 2020 12:09 pm
It works for me but my experience is that most need help and face-to-face meetings. My original post was not arguing against sponsorship.
😁
I apologize. I have not been the exact picture of spirituality lately. I know that you meant no harm and I should have taken care to convey that! Your experience is VITAL to the newcomer! Especially in these times of isolation.

Much love to you and yours.
Absolutely no apology needed, Paige.
:)

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PaigeB
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Re: Sponsorship query.

Post by PaigeB »

Thanks Mike O. :roll: :) :D
Cling to the thought that, in God's hands, the dark past is the greatest possession you have - the key to life and happiness for others. With it you can avert death and misery for them. page 124 BB

Dub24
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Re: Sponsorship query.

Post by Dub24 »

So if you don't sponsor do you guys bring people through the book just not with the sponsor label?

The lady that's bringing me through the book has no sponsor. She did it herself with help from Mark & Joe. Actually that's how I did the first 3 steps, reading the words on the page on my own, talking about it with this lady via WhatsApp /phone calls & listening to Mark & Joe Big book study. Also I started the steps at the beginning of the pandemic when everything was shutting down! And I have to say it's been a eye opening experience so far...

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Spirit Flower
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Re: Sponsorship query.

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She did it herself with help from Mark & Joe.
Do you mean Joe and Charlie? They are famous for their big book tapes which have been around for more than 30 years.

Or are you referring to a AA youtuber, Mark R? I haven't listened to him.
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Dub24
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Re: Sponsorship query.

Post by Dub24 »

Mark Houston & Joe Hawke

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avaneesh912
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Re: Sponsorship query.

Post by avaneesh912 »

So if you don't sponsor do you guys bring people through the book just not with the sponsor label?
I try my best to help another alcoholic understand the relationship between un-manageability and powerlessness. And how "in-action" could lead us back to those strange mental blind-spot. At that point, he is either ready to move on or drop out. And then if the candidate sticks around, we move to other steps. Most drop out when I bring up the topic of inventory. Currently one of them is back in the treatment center. Looking back I sensed he was not willing to make amends. Perhaps when he comes back and reaches up to me, I was thinking about pointing out to him. Maybe he will be more willing this time.
Show him the mental twist which leads to the first drink of a spree. We suggest you do this as we have done it in the chapter on alcoholism.(Alcoholics Anonymous, Page 92)

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