Five.

The 12 Steps are the AA program of recovery from alcoholism.
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Feeya
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Five.

Post by Feeya » Fri Aug 05, 2016 11:21 pm

My name is Feeya and I am an alcoholic.
I feel calm and okay.
I met my sponsor last night and did my fifth step. I was so scared, so full off fear and so ashamed.
At first it felt like I could not get my words out. Since I have never been to confession I had never been in a situation where I had to confess. I was shaking and crying and all I wanted to do was go out and drink, even though I knew I was going to feel better afterwards.

As soon as I was done, as soon as I had told her everything I had written down I felt SO good.
It felt like I had put my past in order, like I went from this chaotic life with no real purpose to finally being able to let go and move on.
I always thought I had already let go of most things and I thought that admitting some things to myself was enough to be honest. It wasn't.
I am so grateful.
One day at a time.

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ann2
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Re: Five.

Post by ann2 » Sat Aug 06, 2016 12:44 am

So moving Feeya. Big big hugs!! Congratulations :)

Ann
"If I don't take twenty walks, Billy Beane send me to Mexico" -- Miguel Tejada

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whipping post
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Re: Five.

Post by whipping post » Sat Aug 06, 2016 4:40 am

That's awesome Feeya!!

Stepchild
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Re: Five.

Post by Stepchild » Sat Aug 06, 2016 4:59 am

Once we have taken this step, withholding nothing, we are delighted.
Step Five

You are living proof...Congratulations!!...Keep moving forward!

D'oh
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Re: Five.

Post by D'oh » Sat Aug 06, 2016 5:00 am

Great Job, Great Step.

Step 6 and 7 are very short steps (in print in the BB) But very large steps into the unknown In life. I missed that my first time through the steps.

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Brock
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Re: Five.

Post by Brock » Sat Aug 06, 2016 7:05 am

Very well done, and great encouragement to those who may still be “balking” at 4 & 5.
"Good morning, this is your Higher Power speaking. I will not be needing your help today."

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Spirit Flower
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Re: Five.

Post by Spirit Flower » Sat Aug 06, 2016 7:09 am

:D
...a score card reading zero...

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Feeya
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Re: Five.

Post by Feeya » Sat Aug 06, 2016 7:55 am

Thanks everyone :) and thank you D'oh for the warning!
One day at a time.

Stepchild
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Re: Five.

Post by Stepchild » Sat Aug 06, 2016 8:02 am

There is a fantastic book called...Drop the Rock....That focuses on steps 6 and 7 that was recommended to me by an oldtimer...It's from Hazeldon....A recommendation that I pass on.

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avaneesh912
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Re: Five.

Post by avaneesh912 » Sat Aug 06, 2016 8:21 am

Hope you have a good understanding of what you need to work on. For me it was totally male chauvinistic up-bringing and in-tolerance, impatience to name a few. Good luck with your journey. Mark H talk on 10 and 11 was a great piece of work for me that aided me at this juncture where he talks about immediately jumping into 10 and 11 and start practicing the principles of the program right away and using the disciplines making amends (cleaning the past).
Show him, from your own experience, how the peculiar mental condition surrounding that first drink prevents normal functioning of the will power (Alcoholics Anonymous, Page 92)

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Feeya
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Re: Five.

Post by Feeya » Sat Aug 06, 2016 9:35 am

Stepchild wrote:There is a fantastic book called...Drop the Rock....That focuses on steps 6 and 7 that was recommended to me by an oldtimer...It's from Hazeldon....A recommendation that I pass on.
Thank you for the recommendation! I will see if there is a german translation to that. I find it very hard to study and truly understand Literatur in english.
One day at a time.

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Feeya
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Re: Five.

Post by Feeya » Sat Aug 06, 2016 9:38 am

avaneesh912 wrote:Hope you have a good understanding of what you need to work on. For me it was totally male chauvinistic up-bringing and in-tolerance, impatience to name a few. Good luck with your journey. Mark H talk on 10 and 11 was a great piece of work for me that aided me at this juncture where he talks about immediately jumping into 10 and 11 and start practicing the principles of the program right away and using the disciplines making amends (cleaning the past).
Thank you for sharing. And yes, I am fully aware of the things I need to work on. Impatience is one for me as well!
One day at a time.

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PaigeB
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Re: Five.

Post by PaigeB » Sat Aug 06, 2016 1:04 pm

Stepchild wrote:There is a fantastic book called...Drop the Rock....That focuses on steps 6 and 7 that was recommended to me by an oldtimer...It's from Hazeldon....A recommendation that I pass on.
I just got a 7 year medallion last Monday and I am in the process of reading this book very slowly. I feel, for the first time, like I am actually working on and understanding Steps 6 & 7.
Step 6 is "AA's way of stating, the best possible attitude one can take in order to make a beginning on this lifetime job... with most of them we shall have to be content with patient improvement." 12&12 Step Six, p.65

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Re: Five.

Post by Stepchild » Sat Aug 06, 2016 1:29 pm

I just got a 7 year medallion last Monday and I am in the process of reading this book very slowly. I feel, for the first time, like I am actually working on and understanding Steps 6 & 7.
That's awesome!.....And Happy Birthday!!

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ezdzit247
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Re: Five.

Post by ezdzit247 » Sat Aug 06, 2016 1:47 pm

Thank you for sharing your ESH on Step 5, Feeya.

I identify..... :D
“To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children...to leave the world a better place...to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded.” -- Ralph Waldo Emerson

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