The goal is not to be better than the other man, but your previous self.
---Dalai Lama
Blessed wrote:Hello. About 10 years ago, my husband left me for his mistress. We are together again. In my 4th Step I listed her as a resentment. My sponsor now tells me I have to make amends to her. I am at a loss. I cannot imagine doing this. It almost seems cruel to me. I would appreciate any thoughts on this. Thinking of it makes me want to cry honestly.
Spirit Flower wrote:I think it is wise to deal with the resentment. After all, the resentment hurts you.
As to step 9, did you hurt her? If yes, then make amends for that. Otherwise, if she hurt you, then pray for her.
Then study both the Big Book and 12x12 steps 4 - 9 and see what you need to do to clear away the wreckage of the past.
Hello. About 10 years ago, my husband left me for his mistress. We are together again. In my 4th Step I listed her as a resentment. My sponsor now tells me I have to make amends to her. I am at a loss. I cannot imagine doing this. It almost seems cruel to me. I would appreciate any thoughts on this. Thinking of it makes me want to cry honestly.
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