Cravings and 'White Knuckling It'

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Rubyfire
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Cravings and 'White Knuckling It'

Post by Rubyfire »

How do people cope when they stop drinking. I'm trying to stay sober and even attending meetings in my hometown. I know the steps but my brain wants to get into the beer.

How do you deal with cravings? I still scheme ways to get my 'fix' and I think about drinking constantly.

I guess I have some things going for me:

- I have decided to take computer courses in the fall at the local college so I have no money. Every dime goes to pay tuition etc.

- I want to get better. I binge drink but my experience with AA makes my binges less bingy (also I can only afford a 6 pack.

- I know AA points to recovery. I see guys happy and sober.

- I'm in good health and my bipolar disorder is in good control.

- I volunteer at a local charity that supports the mentally ill and provides help to them. I'm the computer geek there.

I have some things going against me:

- I'm 38 and live with my parents because I'm manic depressive.

- I get lonely on the weekends and I can get to the 'aww screw it stage I need a drink.'

- I can justify my actions and I am good at hiding them.

So any tips on just how to get through or cope?
Tread softly for you tread on my dreams.
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suzob
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Re: Cravings and 'White Knuckling It'

Post by suzob »

Hello Rubyfire. Im very new to the whole AA experience. Im at the end of my 1st month sober & I was lulledd into a state of false security in the 1st few weeks where the whole giving up drink seemed easy enough, then my brain sobered up & decided to play some serious tricks on me. This last 10 days or so have been crazy - massive mood swings, hallucinations, drunk dreams, cravings for fizzy drinks/sweets/cakes etc etc to fill the sugar void alcohol gave etc

So im prob not experienced enough to give advice but I will anyway - all I can suggest is to keep yourself as busy as possible. Get fit - join a gym, go swimming, buy a bike/skipping rope/punch bag - whatever suits you. Walk. Run.Take up a hobby, see the world through sober eyes - take your camera out with you & go purposely looking for the finer details in the landscape/buildings/fauna etc that youve never noticed before & take pictures of it...that way you can look at them when life feels like cr@p & remind yourself that there is a beautiful world out there. You need to be sober to appreciate it though.

Find something that you love & are good at & do it - although sounds like you have made a very good start in that direction already with your volunteer work. Basically, anything to fill the time, that way you arent sitting bored & 'thinking'

Good luck & keep it up!

Im Suzanne,31yo, Im an alcoholic, 27 days sober.
In the land of the blind, the one eyed man is king...
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veralex
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Re: Cravings and 'White Knuckling It'

Post by veralex »

The AA program isn't about "knowing" the steps, it's about "doing" the steps. It's an action program and that's more than going to meetings.
Get a sponsor, work the steps.
Don't buy drinks, if you don't buy them, you can't drink them. It's as simple as that.
If you have a craving, take some candy, cravings are often the result of a low blood sugar level.
Get enough fluids, non alcoholic fluids, make sure you don't get thirsty.
Change your normal pattern, change people, places and things.
Go to 90 meetings in 90 days if that's what it takes.
Don't take your first drink, live by the hour if necessary, this hour i'm not going to drink. You wait till the next hour and then you say again that you are not going to have a drink this hour. And so on until the day has passed.

Vera
I'm done drinking
curtis s
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Re: Cravings and 'White Knuckling It'

Post by curtis s »

Lots of good stuff in what Vera says. Here's a little bit more. Never forget your last drunk or how you felt later on. For me the worst part of all was promising myself I wouldn't do it again and not believing myself even though I meant it with all my heart and soul. You never have to feel that way again.
Go to lots of meetings. Many of us go to more than one a day if they are available and we can find the time. Later on we return to the world and we can't hide in meetings forever but when you are new becoming dependent on meetings is perfectly okay-far better than being dependent on drinking.Some of us find we must avoid certain people or situations which may provoke the cravings. They can be different for each person. For instance I have known people who couldn't go out to dinner for a while because they would drink a lot in that setting. For me there were certain people I just could not relate to without a couple of drinks in me so I was forced to abandon that relationship. Neither myself or the other person seemed to really care.

My roomates drank so I asked them to keep some of my favorite kinds of booze in their rooms out of sight.

I personally found it important not to deny myself contact with people I cared about even though they drank around me. I told them all my entire situation so that I would be embarrassed to be seen having "just one" by them. That is a pretty personal situation.

Remember that this too is passing now and if you remain sober the cravings will at some point decrease.

Hang in there

Curt
"What a long strange trip it's been."
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SteveC
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Re: Cravings and 'White Knuckling It'

Post by SteveC »

Yep, lots & Lots of meetings. Drink lots of water to help flush out your system. I drank a lot of soda & ate lots of candy that first year. It works.

Hugs!

Steve
Steven M. Clapper
Great Falls, Montana, USA

Serenity is not absence of the storm,
But peace within the storm.
Whiskers57
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Re: Cravings and 'White Knuckling It'

Post by Whiskers57 »

Hi guys, I`m Mark and I am a alcoholic and new here and I have been checking out this forum for a week now,and I see in you all to much of me, for truly I`m not alone in this, just last week I have had enough, and had to get a hold of some help, I was given AA`s Antalope Valley site and a "Smart recovery" site, but AA suits me, My poison has been whisky, A freind and a one year sober is all I know about AA , but just going thru the site has showed me more,
Wish to live again,
Whiskers57
In the end, I must live
Whiskers57
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Re: Cravings and 'White Knuckling It'

Post by Whiskers57 »

Me also, RubyFire, I`m scared of doing this and opening me up, I wish the best in your path to soberity, White Knuckles and all.
In the end, I must live
piper
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Re: Cravings and 'White Knuckling It'

Post by piper »

cope? i'm not sure i did. i just didn't drink. whiteknuckled it. drank a lot of juices, water, and milk shakes. all suggested by old-timers.

cravings? asked the god i didn't have to remove them, i sure as heck couldn't do anything about them.

guess what , he did. Thinking about drinking ? first few months a lot. now rarely been sober since 12/17/94
Piper
just another grateful drunk
12/17/94
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Re: Cravings and 'White Knuckling It'

Post by jmc612989 »

I found this story posted on a British AA site,

A king called all of his wise men and counselors together for a meeting. He addressed them and said, "I want you to go and think, read, and research. Consult the wisest and most learned men in the land. Spare no expense."

"I want you to find the ONE statement that will get me through all situations in life. Whether I am on top of the world or in the pits, find that statement."

"I don't want to learn long and complicated philosophies. I want one simple statement. Find it or write it; I don't care, just bring me the statement."

The men left and consulted for months. They finally returned and handed the King a scroll. The King unrolled the scroll. On it was written four words.

"THIS TOO SHALL PASS" That was it.

The wise men explained. When you are on top of the world, that is but a fleeting
moment, things change, always remember, this too shall pass. When you are in the pits, all nights are followed by day, at your lowest moments remember also, this too shall pass.

All external circumstances and material things change, so matter what your circumstances, remember,

”THIS TOO SHALL PASS”

So I wrote the poster to tell her how much it touched me, that when I was newly sober I remember feeling that the way I felt right then was the way I was always going to feel.

And she replied:

I so agree about that story, it was how it was for me as well, it was
very hard to understand when even after I had quit drinking I was still
unhappy and confused for a time. And more than a bit angry! Emotions
were so very raw during that early time, and exaggerated as well.

Gradually as I worked the steps and prayed and made the changes to my day to day life, things evened out, but man alive what a ride till they did!

I'm grateful that you're done drinking too, my friend. Thanks for taking the time to let me know you found what I shared helpful, it makes a world of difference, helping each other is what it's all about.

In Fellowship,
Rhonda
I remain forever grateful that I'm Done Drinkin
Yours In Recovery
John C
Rubyfire
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Re: Cravings and 'White Knuckling It'

Post by Rubyfire »

Thank you all for your advice but I slipped up last night. I know this means more meetings but I think I am fighting two addictions here. I love to chat online but I can do so only when I am a bit drunk...I know this is wrong. I just wanted to vent.
Tread softly for you tread on my dreams.
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Re: Cravings and 'White Knuckling It'

Post by Whiskers57 »

I understand Rubyfire, I my self an a animation fan of Disney and Don Bluth`s work`s of art and, anime and working in forums and sites was my first love.

Anywho on line it was fun but, later on I had to drink to submit my art and be on the forums there And made a *donkey* out of my self at times.

Hang on Ruby, learning to chat sober is what i`m learning...
In the end, I must live
Rubyfire
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Re: Cravings and 'White Knuckling It'

Post by Rubyfire »

I really just want to quit having the 'urge' to drink and then having the hangover. I have never found myself confronted by something like this in my life - something I couldn't deal with using willpower. The Big Book says I can't do it on willpower alone so I'm utterly new to this.

I have made a fool and much more out of myself online and lost friends so that hurts too.
Tread softly for you tread on my dreams.
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SteveC
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Re: Cravings and 'White Knuckling It'

Post by SteveC »

Hey Ruby!

You didn't lose any friends here. Drinking is what alcoholics do. It's not easy being sober in the beginning. As my my first sponsor used to say: You don't have to change much...Just everything! Last night was last night. This is a whole new day. Try staying sober for just today. And get you butt to some cottin' pickin' meetings!

Hugs!

Steve
Steven M. Clapper
Great Falls, Montana, USA

Serenity is not absence of the storm,
But peace within the storm.
stephbridget
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Re: Cravings and 'White Knuckling It'

Post by stephbridget »

Ruby,
I suggest that you get to real meetings. It will allow you to get out and also to stay away from the online drinking if only for an hour.

You did not lose friends here but you have to be willing to make the change as we can not do it for you.

Love
Steph
Focus on the Now...
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Re: Cravings and 'White Knuckling It'

Post by keithd »

I had to want to be sober more then i wanted to be drunk. My thing was music, i would drink and play cd's. I put the cd's up and did not take them out until i went through the 12 steps. Thanks to AA my life is going uphill instead of downhill like it always had. I can't get drunk if i don't drink.
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