Is this ok?

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Is this ok?

Post by ksea »

I'm a pretty new sober alcoholic, almost 5 months. I love my meetings, especially my Wednesday night home group. There have been a few people who's shares really inspire me and made me want to keep coming back week after week, especially when I thought I wasn't an alcoholic (i was) and didn't want to be like any of the people I saw in the meetings. Thats changed now, but I was wondering if its appropriate to reach out and tell those people how much i appreciate their shares in the meetings, and how meaningful what they said was when i first started to coming to meetings?

I'm just feeling really thankful and wanted to share it, but I didn't know if it was "appropriate", especially if one of them is the opposite gender, or if I should just keep it to myself, if they'll just be like, "silly newcomer doesn't know what she's talking about".

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Re: Is this ok?

Post by avaneesh912 »

Welcome to the forums Ksea. Of course you can share that in meetings and what resonated with you and how you got convinced that you an alcoholic. People do through names in meetings but I would share in general without names.
Show him the mental twist which leads to the first drink of a spree. We suggest you do this as we have done it in the chapter on alcoholism.(Alcoholics Anonymous, Page 92)

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Re: Is this ok?

Post by Brock »

Welcome here ksea. I think it’s very good to say thanks in a situation like this, it encourages those who have helped. I might not tell each one individually, but perhaps say to all that you are thankful to those who encouraged you until you saw the alcoholism, when you were trying to deny it, they know who they are. Maybe if you are speaking one on one with any of them, you can mention they had a big influence on you as well, but you wouldn’t mention names and leave out others if speaking to the whole group, (I’m kind of sure you know that anyway).
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Re: Is this ok?

Post by ODAAT »

Welcome, ksea.

I don't think there is anything wrong with stating that certain members' shares had a beneficial effect on you. Either one-on-one or during a meeting is OK. I've seen it done many times.

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Re: Is this ok?

Post by Spirit Flower »

Yup, go say hi and thank someone for sharing. They probably enjoyed your sharing too.
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Re: Is this ok?

Post by desypete »

of course you can thank them for any help they have been to you
i have thanked lots of people who helped me out so much over the years in aa
but all they ever say to me is pass it on

can i ask why are you concerned there of the opposite sex ? why would that be a problem for you to simply say thanks ?

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Re: Is this ok?

Post by clouds »

I agree with keeping it general, thats wise ksea, good instincts you have there.
" Burn the idea into the consciousness of every man that he can get well regardless of anyone. The only condition is that he trust in God and clean house." page 98 A.A.

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Re: Is this ok?

Post by Roberth »

Hello Ksea, My name is Robert and I am a Los Angeles alcoholic. Speaking from the receiving end I do appreciate it when someone lets me know I said something that as made a difference......especially if it happened when they were new
Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in pretty, well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out and loudly proclaiming WOW What a ride!!!!

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