Sick of It!

New to AA? Got questions? Here's the place to ask. Note that no one person speaks "officially" for AA. AA meetings in your local area are always the best source of information. Note that anyone may post and reply to messages in this forum.
User avatar
Brock
Trusted Servant
Posts: 4202
Joined: Fri Sep 07, 2012 1:45 pm

Re: Sick of It!

Post by Brock »

Of course Troy is going along really well and this is a joy to read, but I will mention that for some of us it may be easier to ask for assistance than for others, it was very difficult for me so I just didn't do it. I am not saying this is a particularly good idea just indicating that there are options. Yes we should listen when someone gives advise as Troy did, and not all of us are going to stick around after the meeting, both with myself and others in my area I have seen this sort of fellowship take time to develop.

It does not mean we don't ask here, or perhaps if we see someone in a meeting whose sobriety we admire a question or two on particular matters. Listening to the big book journey tapes and reading on the internet has bought some of us up to step five, and we found that was the only place we needed another human, and please I am not anti sponsor or anti asking for help, but everyone should at least be aware that it is optional.
"Good morning, this is your Higher Power speaking. I will not be needing your help today."

Troy M.
Forums Enthusiast
Posts: 98
Joined: Thu Jun 21, 2012 9:16 am

Re: Sick of It!

Post by Troy M. »

I tried to go to a meeting this morning on one side of town but none of the people with keys to the building showed up, so we all left. By the time I got across town, the other morning meeting was done. I found another meeting location for this evening but the church where it is held was having their harvest dinner, so no meeting there. So now I am at the last location for a meeting tonight and am here 45 minutes early. I'm going to get some phone numbers tonight! It's been a white knuckle day and I need a meeting! I'll sit here as long as it takes for someone with keys to get here! Prayers and good thoughts are appreciated.

D'oh
Forums Old Timer
Posts: 1025
Joined: Sun Jul 26, 2015 10:51 am

Re: Sick of It!

Post by D'oh »

I hope you have a great meeting Troy. And stick around afterwards, that's when I have had some of my best meetings.

Troy M.
Forums Enthusiast
Posts: 98
Joined: Thu Jun 21, 2012 9:16 am

Re: Sick of It!

Post by Troy M. »

Finally got in a meeting last night and another this morning. I'm pretty certain that my HP was directing me to go to a certain meeting today because the one that was more "convenient" for my timing this morning never happened. So I drove in late to the other morning meeting and lo and behold, they were talking about the importance of sponsors. I shared that I needed a sponsor because I think I am spinning my wheels. One of the men there said that he NEVER goes to the Sunday morning meeting but thought that he was supposed to today. He said, "I'm yer huckleberry!" So now I finally have a number and some guidance. I also have another number from another man who was there.
Day 16 is going well. Got the leaves picked up in the yard and also put back up 4 baseboard heaters we took down for painting. Ready to have the house remodel done!

Stepchild
Forums Old Timer
Posts: 1434
Joined: Tue Sep 16, 2014 1:31 pm

Re: Sick of It!

Post by Stepchild »

That's awesome...Sometimes things work out the way they should. I am always amazed how the right people were put in my path. Follow his lead and get busy...You have good things ahead of you.

Larryp713
Forums Contributor
Posts: 220
Joined: Thu Aug 27, 2015 9:52 am
Location: Olathe, KS

Re: Sick of It!

Post by Larryp713 »

It sounds to me like you really want this, Troy. Don't give up before the miracle happens. I know I would have done a lot of crazy things for a drink toward the end of my drinking, so being inconvenienced by meeting foul ups is not an excuse for me. I hope you get some numbers and call. Please feel free to PM me and I will give you my number. And keep fighting the good fight! It is worth it. Larry
Trudging the Road of Happy Destiny!!!

Troy M.
Forums Enthusiast
Posts: 98
Joined: Thu Jun 21, 2012 9:16 am

Re: Sick of It!

Post by Troy M. »

Day 17 almost in the can. Went to a nice meeting tonight. The topic was the 4th step and I'm not quite done with the first draft and I can see alot of what I heard tonight. My resentments and fears are coming up to be driven pretty much by me as I get over to the 4th column. I'm seeing that the one boss I came to despise because she was an unreasonable b****h acted like that because her employee was an unreasonable drunk ass.

Stepchild
Forums Old Timer
Posts: 1434
Joined: Tue Sep 16, 2014 1:31 pm

Re: Sick of It!

Post by Stepchild »

Troy M. wrote:My resentments and fears are coming up to be driven pretty much by me as I get over to the 4th column.
From the outside looking in. I think the best description I ever heard for step four was this....

The truth about the lie.

Troy M.
Forums Enthusiast
Posts: 98
Joined: Thu Jun 21, 2012 9:16 am

Re: Sick of It!

Post by Troy M. »

Starting up on day 20. We traveled yesterday to pick up our oldest son at the airport for a short visit. Both of my brothers and my sister came out and we had a nice visit. Later today we'll be home. Great day to be sober.

User avatar
whipping post
Forums Contributor
Posts: 379
Joined: Wed Oct 29, 2014 10:20 am

Re: Sick of It!

Post by whipping post »

Really glad to see you doing well. Keep up the good work on those steps. They are truly a life changer.

User avatar
leejosepho
Forums Old Timer
Posts: 1885
Joined: Mon Sep 07, 2009 4:55 am
Location: 200 miles south of Little Rock
Contact:

Re: Sick of It!

Post by leejosepho »

Troy M. wrote:My resentments and fears are coming up to be driven pretty much by me as I get over to the 4th column. I'm seeing that the one boss I came to despise because she was an unreasonable b****h acted like that because her employee was an unreasonable drunk ass.
Step Four from our book does not have any fourth column, and my own attempt to use a canned "guide" that does actually distracted me from things I needed to learn there. Resentment and fear are mere emotions that can happen when our natural human instincts are hurt or threatened, and I needed to learn new actions to take whenever those came up. Hence, Step Four is where I was shown "the key to the future" in learning to pray for the unreasonable goofs of whatever kind that I used to get drunk over, and none of that has anything to do with looking for defects of character. I hope you do not miss that!
=======================
"We A.A.s do not *stay* away from drinking [one day at a
time] -- we *grow* away from drinking [one day at a time]."
("Lois Remembers", page 168, quoting Bill, emphasis added)
=======================

Stepchild
Forums Old Timer
Posts: 1434
Joined: Tue Sep 16, 2014 1:31 pm

Re: Sick of It!

Post by Stepchild »

leejosepho wrote: Hence, Step Four is where I was shown "the key to the future" in learning to pray for the unreasonable goofs of whatever kind that I used to get drunk over, and none of that has anything to do with looking for defects of character.
In the directions they mention...

Therefore, we started upon a personal inventory. This was Step Four. A business which takes no regular inventory usually goes broke. Taking a commercial inventory is a fact-finding and a fact-facing process. It is an effort to discover the truth about the stock-in-trade. One object is to disclose damaged or unsalable goods, to get rid of them promptly and without regret. If the owner of the business is to be successful, he cannot fool himself about values.

We did exactly the same thing with our lives. We took stock honestly. First, we searched out the flaws in our make-up which caused our failure. Being convinced that self, manifested in various ways, was what had defeated us, we considered its common manifestations.

pg 64

Maybe you can explain what those flaws in our make-up are?

User avatar
leejosepho
Forums Old Timer
Posts: 1885
Joined: Mon Sep 07, 2009 4:55 am
Location: 200 miles south of Little Rock
Contact:

Re: Sick of It!

Post by leejosepho »

Stepchild wrote:Maybe you can explain what those flaws in our make-up are?
The defects we look for following discovery of the key to the future.
=======================
"We A.A.s do not *stay* away from drinking [one day at a
time] -- we *grow* away from drinking [one day at a time]."
("Lois Remembers", page 168, quoting Bill, emphasis added)
=======================

Stepchild
Forums Old Timer
Posts: 1434
Joined: Tue Sep 16, 2014 1:31 pm

Re: Sick of It!

Post by Stepchild »

You also mention there is no fourth column...I have to ask...Just to make it clear. When the directions mention this...

Referring to our list again. Putting out of our minds the wrongs others had done, we resolutely looked for our own mistakes. Where had we been selfish, dishonest, self-seeking and frightened? Though a situation had not been entirely our fault, we tried to disregard the other person involved entirely. Where were we to blame? The inventory was ours, not the other man's. When we saw our faults we listed them. We placed them before us in black and white. We admitted our wrongs honestly and were willing to set these matters straight.
pg 67

What column did you list them in?

User avatar
tyg
Forums Contributor
Posts: 479
Joined: Sun Mar 29, 2015 6:34 pm

Re: Sick of It!

Post by tyg »

Troy M. wrote: I shared that I needed a sponsor because I think I am spinning my wheels. One of the men there said that he NEVER goes to the Sunday morning meeting but thought that he was supposed to today. He said, "I'm yer huckleberry!" So now I finally have a number and some guidance. I also have another number from another man who was there.
Beautiful!!! It is so weird, I still look back and get amazed how; when I take action and my motives are in a pure place, the universe seems to line up and give me just what I need. Keep coming back, life will keep getting better, more interesting & entertaining. I've made some great friendships by calling those numbers I got and made the first move. :)
~The secret to the AA program is the first three words on page 112~

Locked