alcoholism vs alcohol abuse

[lulu18]

hi. i'm new to the boards.

does anyone know the difference between alcoholism vs alcohol abuse? i'm trying to figure out which one i have and i can't seem to find an answer on the net.

any help would be greatly appreciated.

[hazel4]

Good question Lulu and welcome

I am Hazel, alcoholic in Cambridge UK

Other, more experienced membrs will undoubtedly offer a better explanation, However. it is my understanding that there are several steps of the ladder, starting with the occasional social drink at parties or on weekends. The number of drinks and the occasions increase until we find excuses for serious heavy drinking. From there the chosen drink is "abused", i.e. used wrongly and to excess. Once on that step of the ladder it progresses to a physical and psychological "disease" we call alcoholism. At this point few have a choice of whether they drink or not: the obsession, the craving is generally beyond their control. To offer a small example, you might try not drinking for...say...a month and see how you feel.

Those are my personal experiences and also the shares of others. I will not mention the help AA can offer because that was not your question. There are a number of answers in the book Alcoholics Anonymous. Chapter Three tells you "More About Alcoholism". You can find this book on the internet if interested. In addition, if you need further information, support, understanding, then I can say again....Welcome.

Peace
Hazel

[powerlessoveralcohol]

Hello, Lulu.
William here, alcoholic.
When I was an active alcoholic, I never knew what was going to happen after the first drink.
And I could not resist the first drink because I was powerless to control my drinking.

Even when my alcoholism at first took the form of binge drinking...you know, drink daily for a period of time, then somehow stop for a period of time...the daily drinking period of time got longer and the period of not drinking got shorter, until there was no period of not drinking daily. Nothing else but drinking daily mattered. Nothing.

So, in my experience, that is what alcoholism is. I have no experience of alcohol abuse, other than that.
It is good you have come here to ask this question. Others will be along shortly with other answers.

[Mike O'R]

Hi Lulu,

Can you tell us why you are trying to figure out which one you have?

-Mike

[lulu18]

i definitely abuse alcohol, don't know if i'm an alcoholic. i drink in large amounts and hide the empties from my husband so he doesn't know how much i drink. in the book (chapter 3 that hazel referred me to) it states the test of walking into a bar, having one, and then leaving. i can do that. i do drink tons, though, at home. i don't have jitters, don't need to drink daily, etc. but i have been blacking out when i do drink (almost two bottles of wine last night). drinking has caused issues w/husband. he says that i have a drinking problem, but doesn't necessarily think that i'm alcoholic. of course, he doesn't know how much i really drink.

i guess i'm one of those people that need someone to tell me, "yes, you are an alcoholic" because i find that the aa criteria doesn't fit me 100%.....i don't drink during the day or first thing in the morning. never lost a job. never got in trouble with the law. do i think about drinking often? absolutely. am i "obsessed" about alcohol? i'm not sure.

[avaneesh912]

Obsession of mind, the way Big Book illustrates it as a queer mental twist. That it is going to be fine this time. I am going to handle liquor well this time...

The idea that somehow, someday he will control and enjoy his drinking is the great obsession of every abnormal drinker. The persistence of this illusion is astonishing. Many pursue it into the gates of insanity or death.

The literal obsession did eventually ruled me at the end of my drinking career. When, only thing my mind would think is that of how soon or how am i going to get my next drink.

[Blue Moon]

hi. i'm new to the boards.

does anyone know the difference between alcoholism vs alcohol abuse? i'm trying to figure out which one i have and i can't seem to find an answer on the net.

any help would be greatly appreciated.

All alcoholics abuse alcohol. But the only way I have for you to answer the question for yourself is if you decide to quit drinking.

But if you continue abusing alcohol, chances are the label is irrelevant - you'dl still have complications that arise from alcohol abuse.

[Ken_the_Geordie]

Hi Lulu, welcome to the forum; I'm Ken and I'm an alcoholic from the UK.

in the book (chapter 3 that hazel referred me to) it states the test of walking into a bar, having one, and then leaving. i can do that. i do drink tons, though, at home.

When you do this; go into a bar, have one drink and then leave; how do you feel? Satisfied? Or do you feel like you want more? And when you're not drinking, you say you're not a daily drinker, can you put down how you feel about not drinking? No matter how you answer this I can't say if you're an alcoholic, I'm only asking out of interest.

In my own experience, there were occasions when I could only have two beers; for example when I was in the army and some lunch time official function meant that I only could have two beers and no more; and I did it, but I always felt restless, irritable, and discontented with only two. I always wanted more booze; I was never satisfied with what I drank. I made sure I drank after work though.

And I too also hid my drinking from Mrs Ken; this is a big warning sign that I never saw. I thought Mrs Ken just didn't understand that I drank to 'relax' from the pressures I was facing (even if there were no pressures; I still felt them). I thought she was a bore and was over reacting when she complained about my drinking and behaviour.

But towards the end of my drinking, even I could see that it was far from normal, but I just couldn't stop or moderate; it was all I could think about. If I wasn't drinking, I was planning my day around making it possible for me to drink as early as possible. I started planning my own suicide; life was getting tough - I couldn't stop and I thought all my problems were due to drinking - and eventually I ended up in AA thinking I had a 'drinking problem' (my doctor called it 'alcohol dependency'), but very quickly after hearing other AAers describing how they drank, and their feelings, I realised that I wasn't a 'problem drinker', that I was an alcoholic.

Funny really. I always thought alcoholics lived on the streets, or in total squalor. That's why I didn't think I was an alcoholic, because I didn't really know what one was. Your original question with reference alcoholism and alcohol abuse is a good one. Until you can define what the problem actually is, you can't find a solution to fix it. For example if you're car is broken, the problem with it has to be identified before a remedy can be given. So can I ask you what your definition of an alcoholic is; that may help us help you?

[Sober25]

Hi Lulu,

You say you want someone to tell you that you are an alcoholic. Well, it wouldn't matter how many people told you - the important thing is for you to admit it. According to what you said you are drinking in large amounts (tons), hiding evidence of your drinking, having black outs, drinking has caused issues with your husband (who is convinced you have a drinking problem, and he doesn't even know how much you really drink), and you are obviously concerned about your drinking or you would not have posted this message. That sure is a lot of evidence that would tend to indicate that you are an alcoholic. What about going to an AA meeting to see if you can relate? Then you can decide for yourself. It is your decision to make, and your decision on what you want to do about it. I wish you all the best.

[Renegade27]

Hi, Lulu - what difference does the word make? The question you've got to ask yourself is are you ready to stop drinking.

If you can do it on your own - great.

I think few of us (myself included) have tried and failed that route over the years. After 3-4 years of trying little tricks to stop or moderate and landing right back where and continued down that free-falling elevator. I walked into my first AA meeting about 45 days ago. Scary as all hell. Now I can hardly consider missing a meeting. I, and I think most of us, identify with much read and discussed and leave the meetings really uplifted ready for another 24 hours of sobriety.

I''m new to this whole "alcoholic" world (although I can just as easily say I am/ was a "hard drinker") and have seen through others that AA, if you are willing to work it, DOES work.

So, forget the titles. The only question that really matters are you ready to stop or not?

[ann2]

If you can do it on your own - great.

I think few of us (myself included) have tried and failed that route over the years.

Raising hand vigorously here!!!

I didn't go to my first meeting thinking, "I'm an alcoholic! I belong here!" I went thinking, "I cannot stop drinking and I'm dependent on alcohol, what am I to do?" I honestly had quite a serious debate over calling myself alcoholic, but in the end made a rational choice, based on my desire to be part of AA.

Why? because these people called themselves alcoholics and they had found a solution. I wanted that solution (with every cell in my body) and to get it I was willing to call myself Annie Monkeyfanny. Calling myself Ann Alcoholic has actually I think been of more benefit.

So -- I tried to stop, I was horrified to find that I couldn't, I was seeing pretty much my entire self-destruction, and I went to AA and found hope instead. Hurray!!! And after a long time and a lot of investigating I can say with all seriousness and conviction that I AM alcoholic.

But I didn't know that in the beginning. I just started along this path because I had no where else to turn. And that was a GOOD thing, as it turned out.

Ann

[Chris S.]

Simple definition of addiction, " Continued use of a substance, known to be harmful to the user."

"If something is causing problems in your life, it is a problem"

Lulu, if you want to stop drinking but cannot... If you have to lie about how much you drink... If your life is unmanageable, and by that I mean you have to manipulate your life around your drinking... If you tend to drink more than you originally intended... If you black out, defined as having no recollection of events at times while drinking... If any or all of these are true about you, your relationship with alcohol should be investigated. Does this mean your an alcoholic? That is up to you to decide. But do yourself a favor, make it an informed decision. Look up AA in your phone book, make a call and go to a meeting.

Alcoholism is a progressive and fatal disease if not treated. There is no cure, the only treatment is complete abstinence. One of three things happen to every alcoholic, they wind up locked up, covered up, or sobered up. Alcoholism will not only kill the sufferer, it will take away everything worthwhile in life before doing so.

[lulu18]

thanks, guys, for all of your replies! they have been a tremendous help.

so yeah, i'm definitely an alcoholic.

[Ken_the_Geordie]

Hi Lulu,

thanks, guys, for all of your replies! they have been a tremendous help.

so yeah, i'm definitely an alcoholic.

When I first came to AA and heard that I had to get 'honest', I didn't know what they meant; but admitting I was an alcoholic - therefore getting honest with myself - was the first step I took.

I'm pleased for you; once you start to understand what the problem actually is, you can start to find out what the precise solution to that problem is; and AA has that; a precise solution - a programme of action - that really works.

Can I ask if you've been to any face-to-face AA meetings?

[walkshaw]

i definitely abuse alcohol, don't know if i'm an alcoholic. i drink in large amounts and hide the empties from my husband so he doesn't know how much i drink. in the book (chapter 3 that hazel referred me to) it states the test of walking into a bar, having one, and then leaving. i can do that. i do drink tons, though, at home. i don't have jitters, don't need to drink daily, etc. but i have been blacking out when i do drink (almost two bottles of wine last night). drinking has caused issues w/husband. he says that i have a drinking problem, but doesn't necessarily think that i'm alcoholic. of course, he doesn't know how much i really drink.

i guess i'm one of those people that need someone to tell me, "yes, you are an alcoholic" because i find that the aa criteria doesn't fit me 100%.....i don't drink during the day or first thing in the morning. never lost a job. never got in trouble with the law. do i think about drinking often? absolutely. am i "obsessed" about alcohol? i'm not sure.

Dear Lulu,

Alcoholic drinking is not defined by how much one drinks, or how often one drinks, but rather what happens once that person takes that first drink.. the unpredictability (or predictability depending on one's point of view) of my behavior once I start drinking by taking that 1st drink of alcohol. No one can tell you that you ARE an alcoholic; that is something one must decipher yourself. I'd suggest reading the "Doctor's Opinion" and Chapters 1 through 3; look for any similarities to your circumstances - NOT the differences. There are many alcoholics who come into our rooms who haven't lost a job (yet), never got into trouble with the law (yet), or didn't drink during the day or 1st thing in the morning (yet). Some of these people found recovery without going to the extreme low bottoms that others had to endure before giving up & finding the solution in AA. Others, like yourself, who weren't sure about whether or not they really were alcoholic and "wanted" to quit drinking decided they didn't need recovery in AA... of these... some made it back after experiencing the "YETS" while others never did and died a horrific alcoholic death.

I never experienced blackouts as you say you do, yet I was an alcoholic who took it to a low-bottom in order to finally surrender & find AA. I had been a "functioning" alcoholic for years before the "yets" caught up with me.

For those who are unsure of whether or not they are alcoholic, I suggest three alternatives: 1) Try nothing & keep doing what you're doing, as time will bring out the truth as to whether or not you are indeed an alcoholic; 2) Try what our basic text says about not drinking for an extended period of time and see what happens; and 3) Get a sponsor & give AA's 12-Step recovery program a chance... what have you got to lose? Regardless of what you decide, we'll be here for you.

Good luck