Search found 25 matches

by coachdonsul
Mon Jun 16, 2014 1:25 am
Forum: Discussions
Topic: Struggling
Replies: 40
Views: 8032

Re: Struggling

i have been coming to meetings for 9 months and sober for around 5 months... For work I have recently had to move a 3 hour flight from my family and am in an apartment. The move was due to a new job which I needed as I took time out when I decided to change my life. The new job is bringing the fear...
by coachdonsul
Fri Jun 13, 2014 6:36 am
Forum: Discussions
Topic: Will Sobriety Be Worth Losing My Wife?
Replies: 15
Views: 6422

Re: Will Sobriety Be Worth Losing My Wife?

I want so badly to give in. She's my soulmate. Please give me a reason to give in. Please tell me how to stay here with her without condoning her drinking or building resentment. Matt, You don't mention children, so I assume there are none from this marriage. That is an important consideration. Wha...
by coachdonsul
Thu Jun 12, 2014 7:06 pm
Forum: Discussions
Topic: Self Will and Alcoholism; Cause & Effect? I Don't See It?
Replies: 35
Views: 14822

Re: Self Will and Alcoholism; Cause & Effect? I Don't See I

...these are important, spiritual issues for me. It's nonsensical to suggest that asking questions and attempting to understand is somehow an indication of ego, denial or is in any way negative...I've been around AA long enough to know that asking questions and rational thought is often a serious t...
by coachdonsul
Mon Jun 09, 2014 12:57 pm
Forum: Discussions
Topic: this might be a little controversial/ hmm maybe not
Replies: 28
Views: 6428

Re: this might be a little controversial/ hmm maybe not

Kevin, Don't buy into some one telling you that masturbation is some kind of addiction. There is a whole treatment industry that is trying to build up the idea of sex addiction and it is just so much BS. A good book on the subject is "The Myth Of Sex Addiction," by Dr. David Ley. Available from AMAZ...
by coachdonsul
Fri Jun 28, 2013 4:49 am
Forum: The Family Afterwards
Topic: My Addict Famly Member... PLEASE HELP!!!
Replies: 9
Views: 12669

Re: My Addict Famly Member... PLEASE HELP!!!

This is a very common phenomena for recovered addicts and alcoholics. She is doing what she thinks is best for you whether you think so or not, and she is doing what is best for her. Alanon may help you, but I'd suggest letting some time pass before you react and see if you can just let this go. I a...
by coachdonsul
Mon Jun 24, 2013 5:13 pm
Forum: For the Newcomer
Topic: Wow, I can't believe it has come to this...
Replies: 9
Views: 2103

Re: Wow, I can't believe it has come to this...

Welcome Leesa, Please go check out a meeting. If you want to just sit and not say a word, not even if they ask if there is someone new there, that's really OK. Keep coming back to this forum and posting your questons and your feelings. Someone is nearly always online and willing to work with you. Ju...
by coachdonsul
Sun Jun 23, 2013 11:23 am
Forum: Discussions
Topic: What Are AA's Principles?
Replies: 50
Views: 14353

Re: What Are AA's Principles?

AA's program is designed to help with one problem, and it fits alcoholics well. We cannot worry about the problems of "all" or the solution that will be the best fit for them, or the size they need it to be for their non-alcoholic problem. For unrelated problems we're directed to seek elsewhere for...
by coachdonsul
Sun Jun 23, 2013 11:09 am
Forum: Discussions
Topic: What Are AA's Principles?
Replies: 50
Views: 14353

Re: What Are AA's Principles?

“Don, when I got sober, I had spent quite a bit of money on psychologists, psychiatrists, drug and alcohol clinicians, medical doctors, I had also gone to more than a few churches and not one of them did anything for this drunk or my alcoholism. They tried as hard as their education would let them”...
by coachdonsul
Sun Jun 23, 2013 9:08 am
Forum: For the Newcomer
Topic: Hi all... some questions...
Replies: 9
Views: 2488

Re: Hi all... some questions...

So tell me... being sober, can I get the same "high" I crave? or is it something i need to live without, can I be charismatic and funny without it? how do I quell the drama loving queen within?.... thanks for listening/reading and good luck to everyone dealing with their own demons.. oh and sorry a...
by coachdonsul
Sun Jun 23, 2013 4:41 am
Forum: Discussions
Topic: What Are AA's Principles?
Replies: 50
Views: 14353

Re: What Are AA's Principles?

And yet....... you are here! :) I tried many ways to get sober, and the only thing that worked was Alcoholics Anonymous. I am so grateful for all those AA'ers who actually knew how to pass on this simple program and why :) Patsy et al, When I sobered up in 1986 the only program available was AA, so...
by coachdonsul
Sat Jun 22, 2013 1:36 pm
Forum: Discussions
Topic: What Are AA's Principles?
Replies: 50
Views: 14353

Re: What Are AA's Principles?

it wouldn't surprise me to find that some members believe they should disregard anything written at all and instead roll the bones to determine the best way to live their lives in sobriety. But as I wouldn't feel good about suggesting to the bone-rollers that they are hyper-sensitive, behind the ti...
by coachdonsul
Sat Jun 22, 2013 4:27 am
Forum: Discussions
Topic: Depression
Replies: 15
Views: 4307

Re: Depression

Great post Hanna. I was diagnosed as suffering from depression and refused to take any medication, but I did start studying and researching how people got past their depressions. Your advice was spot on. To this day, a gratitude list is one of my useful tools when I start to get down on life and mys...
by coachdonsul
Fri Jun 21, 2013 4:45 am
Forum: Discussions
Topic: What Are AA's Principles?
Replies: 50
Views: 14353

Re: What Are AA's Principles?

Bill says in "AA Comes Of Age" that he wrote the 12 & 12 primarily to make clear these 24 principles of AA. My personal feeling is that the 12 & 12 should be the primary text of AA and first place that new comers go to in order to get sober relegating the BB to more of a historical status. But, alas...
by coachdonsul
Wed Jun 19, 2013 4:05 am
Forum: For the Newcomer
Topic: Character Defects
Replies: 12
Views: 6354

Re: Character Defects

Good insights Robben. We do love and cherish our resentments. Sad that they often guide our way. We seem to be driving down the road of life looking in our rear view mirrors for guidance. :D

Don
by coachdonsul
Tue Jun 18, 2013 5:39 pm
Forum: Discussions
Topic: The Devil Loves Drama
Replies: 6
Views: 2343

Re: The Devil Loves Drama

In my case, I need to avoid situations that foster the anger that stems from self righteousness. It's very easy for me to become angry when I read the news. The news is full of evil and injustice. My problem is that I can't keep that anger in its box: it spills over into other arenas in my life, an...